Connected

The past couple of weeks have been very much up and down. For the first two weeks I was miserable, and albeit probably just as miserable to be around (bless my family for always being so patient and understanding). I had a very difficult time adjusting to the changes that were unfolding because it felt as though some of the best parts of my life, as well as the parts that I was looking forward to were slowly vanishing. It felt like a domino effect, one thing leading to the other with a succession of change that felt completely beyond my control. And that feeling of losing control is a very scary thing. Not knowing if the people you love will come out of this in good health is a very scary thing. And in all honesty, I felt selfish. Because at the end of the day my reasons for feeling this way were merely minuscule problems compared to the ones that the entire world was battling. And in knowing this, I felt worse.

But as I said, some days are down, and others are up. And on those days that are good, I focus on why I’m lucky. Lucky to know that everyone I love is safe, and lucky to have been able to come home to ensure that my parents were okay. Lucky to still have a job and in that, a daily purpose, and lucky to feel as safe as one can during a time like this. But I also think about the world and how remarkable it is the way people have come together to fight against this pandemic. How across the globe, immense compassion is being shared as the world grieves for those that it has lost, whilst fighting for those that are still here. I think about how fortunate I am to live in a country where the government is doing everything it can to mitigate the spread of the virus, while providing financial support for its citizens. How so many organizations around the world are working tirelessly towards finding solutions and providing aid. I think about the number families and friends who are making an exceptional effort to stay connected and find ways to make such unfamiliar circumstances feel comfortable. And I think about my Sister, who I wish so dearly could just come home, but instead is on the front lines with other healthcare workers around the world, risking their own lives in order to save ours.

This morning, I thought about how beautiful the little birds sounded outside my window as they sang without any noise to drown out their song. It’s kind of ironic isn’t it? How at a time that humanity is afraid to breath, the natural world finally gets a chance to again? As though our world being on pause has allowed nature to slowly reset itself after everything it had endured even in just the past few months. Recently, I read about how the absence of tourists in Venice have resulted in the canals becoming clearer than they’ve been in a long time, allowing schools of fish to be seen swimming through them. I read about how along the shores of Odisha, thousands of sea turtles have nested completely undisturbed from human influence for the first time in decades. It’s amazing how the world works, how much we all affect one another, and how connected everyone and everything is. It’s very eye opening. Thinking about all of this makes me realize that there is in fact always light, and not just at the end of the tunnel but all around us.

Living through such uncertain times where life and the future is masked with such a huge question mark is no doubt, terrifying. Our ideas of normality are likely forever changed, and not knowing when the anxiety, fear and panic can reasonably be placed aside is unsettling. However, something that brings me a sense of relief is thinking about how much compassion and sense of community that has resulted from all of this. Something I hope, we can continue to carry forth into the future. There will always be clouds that shade the world in darkness, but at the end of the day, after the rain pours the sun must shine again. Everything is temporary, and I want to believe that this is too.

Stay safe, stay connected, and please stay home.

– Vidhya

Ps. This is a photo of my sister (centre) and her fellow doctors working in the ICU after the first wave of cases hit. Here’s to her and everyone around the world doing everything they can to help. Thanks for saving the world <3